Especially as moms, we know all too well what it feels like to have a lot to get done with very little time to do it. I call this the ‘Never Enough Time Dilemma”
You know what I am talking about. I am talking about too many kids activities, too many projects, meetings, emails, calls, requests, messages — on and on it seems to go. An endless to-do list for each day of the week.
We want to have time for family and extended family, exercise, eating well, prayer, learning something cool, traveling, going out with friends, taking care of finances and errands, keeping up with podcasts and news and on and on.
Whew! I’m exhausting just saying all of that…
How can we manage to do all of those things in what is obviously limited time? How can we stuff all our hopes, dreams, tasks and errands into such a limited box?
I will get to that in just a hot second… but first, I want to talk about what is really going on.
Whats Going On
The problem isn’t that we have too little time — we all get the same amount of time each day and each week. It’s the exact right amount of time.
It’s possible that we have too many things to do. But actually I think the real problem for most of us is that we want to do too much in the time we have each day. The amount of things we have to do is not usually the difficulty, but rather that given how much time we have, we want to cram too much into it.
We are trying to be SuperMom and we may not even realize it – thinking that running day after day is just the norm.
Come on – you know I’m right. Look at your to-do list for tomorrow. What could you legitimately remove and have the world not end?
We want more and more, and are not satisfied with what we’re actually able to do. It’s this lack of being satisfied that is part of the real problem. We reject our experience, and want more.
We are running in a sense of scarcity instead of abundance. We are focusing on “what else” instead of “what is.” In hustling day in and day out, we fail to see the amazingness in what we already have. To see the profound beauty in the experience we’re having right now. To love what is.
So how do we conquer the Not Enough Time Dilemma?
There are three steps we can take to conquer this dilemma.
1 – Remove anything on your list that simply is not necessary.
Only accept onto your to-do list that which will give you joy, peace and well-being. The rest can be let go.
Every time you are asked to do something, measure it against those three words. Ask yourself – does this bring me joy? Does this bring me peace? Is this for my greater well-being?
If you cannot answer yes to one of those, then do not accept the task to be done.
This isn’t being self-ish. It’s protecting your sanity and helping you to not get spread too thin which most of us moms easily allow ourselves to do. #beenthere
2 – We need to be aware of when we’re feeling overwhelmed.
What does this feel like, right now, for you in your body? What does it feel like to never feel like there’s enough time to do all you want to do?
Learn to identify this feeling, and start to recognize it when it’s happening.When the feeling comes, start retraining your mind from wanting more … to seeing the greatness of what is right in front of you. Retrain by using a new thinking pattern.
For example, if you are folding laundry, instead of using that time to listen to a podcast, or worry about what else needs to be done – try to take a few minutes to really get into the moment.
Let your mind be filled with gratitude for the little bodies that wear that clothing. Be truly grateful they are alive, and well and with you. It is amazing how this minute of gratitude and abundance can change your body chemistry and release joy.
All we can do is one thing at a time. All we have is this moment, this day.
And it is enough. It is beautiful, incredible, if we just really see it and appreciate it.We can do one thing, and be incredibly grateful that we are able to do that one thing.
Each moment, we can do another one thing, giving it our full attention, giving it full weight, acting as if it might be our last act, and truly appreciating the opportunity we have to be alive in this moment.
3 – There is nothing wrong in getting some help.
I know as moms sometimes it can be a badge of honor to get it all done on our own. It’s easy to think “I got this” when we really don’t or when it is actually killing us. Trust me, I have literally gone through this and I share some of my story in my book Fibromyalgia Fighter.
Honestly though it is okay to hire someone to help clean your house.
It’s fine to pay the neighbor kid to cut the grass.
Partner up with a mommy friend or two and take turns watching each others kids.